The dreams that I fear
by Ren-chan aka Matt Patrick
Summary: Dreams can help the heart control the mind, which knows what he feels might not be right. (HaoxRen)


_He could see the fire far away from where he was resting and knew without a doubt the others wouldn't take long to notice what was happening and then go and try to fight the protégé of the Spirit of Fire.   
  
His mind tried to tell him to move, to tell them and then help to defeat him, yet his heart, his traitorous heart, stopped him, trying to give the one he was watching a little more time.   
  
He shook his head, sighing as he reprimanded himself for feeling this way. For wanting to protect the one they were supposed to destroy.   
  
"No," his mind said, "not for wanting to protect him. For loving him, when you know you shouldn't."   
  
A soft chuckle escaped his lips as he thought how he seemed to always go against what seemed to be right at the moment. And as in cue, Manta noticed the fire Hao had created and told the others to move. As he stood up, he noticed a pair of eyes on him. Blue eyes, in fact, which watched him knowingly as he made his way into the woods, not waiting for the girl to try and talk with him.   
  
He didn't dislike Pirika, but he wasn't exactly happy with her, for she had been getting that knowing look far too often lately, most of all when he was thinking about his prohibited love. Which was kind of unnerving.   
  
Not that he would admit that to anyone, of course.   
  
He followed the path towards the fire, actually staying in front as always just to not call attention to himself. And as they made their way into the clearing, which had obviously been full of trees before the fire had killed them all, he saw him.   
  
Standing there proudly, looking at them with the smirk on his handsome face which always annoyingly made Ren's heart ache, was Hao Asakura, looking as sexy and proud of his actions as always.   
  
He didn't actually listen to what the group said to Hao, only gazed at him, with his usual stern expression on his face, yet his golden eyes betrayed him by shining deep down with emotion, though luckily it couldn't really be seen unless one happened to be looking for it.   
  
As the rest jumped up and started attacking the older Asakura twin, his body surprised him by refusing to move, and he found himself standing there, feet glued to the floor as his friends were kicked around with a single hand motion by the one who controlled fire.   
  
He heard one of them call his name confused, yet he couldn't recognize the voice, for he was too bothered by his own inability to move, and fearing that finally his heart had taken over his head, he let out a shuddery breath.   
  
A soft laugh uttered by him did catch his attention, though. "Not going to attack me, Ren? Too afraid to move?"   
  
Words which he hadn't meant to say aloud came out of his mouth. "Please stop."   
  
Hao just raised an eyebrow at him, an amused expression on his face as he tilted his face curiously to the side. "Stop?"   
  
An embarrassed flush covered his cheeks. "You don't really have to do this. I-" He hesitated before continuing. "I don't wanna fight you, Hao."   
  
He could feel everyone's eyes on him, yet he couldn't stop himself from finally opening his heart.   
  
"I just can't fight you," he added in a soft whisper, never looking away from Hao's eyes.   
  
"And why should I stop? Or listen to you?" answered the other boy still looking at him, not mockingly, but with curiosity.   
  
"Because you'll end up alone if you don't stop." he continued. "Because," he added with a softer voice, "you won't have to be afraid of that anymore. Because I will be there for you if you stop." His heart beating faster than ever, he closed his mouth and waited for the answer his heart and mind feared and waited for at the same time, anxiously.   
  
Silence fell over the clearing as Ren finished speaking. Hao's eyes were unreadable, yet he moved a forward to where Ren was, finally stopping just in front of him.   
  
"And what makes you think I would do this?"   
  
"You're human. And-" He didn't finish his sentence.   
  
"And?" prompted Hao.   
  
"And if I can fall in love with you, then there's a chance I might not be as wrong as I think I am right now," he finally said, flush becoming a full blush.   
  
A smirk appeared on Hao's face. "True, true." he raised Ren's chin with his right hand, making him look at him. "You might be quite more right than you believe, Ren." he whispered, getting closer to his face as he spoke. "Yet," added him then, moving away at the last minute. "You're not ready yet, for what loving me means." moving quickly, he gave him a peck on the lips, then turned around and started walking out of the clearing. "We shall meet again, young one."   
  
And he left then, leaving a confused Ren standing between his shell-shocked friends, who still lay on the floor, too hurt and shocked to even try to move after witnessing what they had just seen.   
  
Ren's arm rose without him being able to control it, in the direction Hao had gone, his hand extended on a silent prayer.   
  
"Hao…,"_   
  
Before he could utter another word, his world shook, and he found himself laying on his bed, tears in his eyes and feeling as vulnerable as a newborn baby.   
  
Shuddering, and alone, he turned around, and closed his eyes tightly, trying to force himself to forget he had just dreamed that.   
  
"No…" he shook his head stubbornly, shaking. "I won't ever act like that. It's," he paused, sighing "useless, anyway."   
  
And hugging himself tightly, a single word escaped his lips as the tears he had been holding fell from his golden eyes.   
  
"Hao…"   
  
And outside his window, the boy who that name belonged to smiled, turning around to leave the place.   
  
"I guess you're not ready yet to accept it, my Ren." He looked up at the moon. "But don't worry, I'll wait for you, as long as it takes."   
  
And silently, he disappeared into the night.   
  
-----   
  
A/N: As Chisa-chan said, I seem to be on a Haoren roll! O.o … I wonder if that's a bad thing. *shakes head* Anyway, as always, review if you feel like it ^_^. 


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